LGBTQ+ Elopement Tips for Your Dream Wedding

So you and your partner are thinking about, and maybe have even started to plan an elopement, but you’re still struggling with answering the question, “Should we elope?” 

As an LGBTQ+ elopement photographer, I’m all for elopements, but I don’t think that this decision should be taken lightly. It’s important to consider what really feels right for you and your partner and that whatever choice you make aligns with your wedding vision and what you both truly want. 

If you’re an LGBTQ+ couple contemplating whether or not to elope, this blog is for you. My hope is that it provides you with clarity and guidance and helps you feel at peace with whatever choice you make. 

Here are my best elopement tips, the most important things to consider before eloping, and the questions you should be asking.

Questions LGBTQ+ Couples Should Ask Themselves Before Eloping

What does an elopement mean for us? 

Deciding to elope is a significant and personal decision. I encourage you to consider why you and your partner want to choose an elopement and what it represents for you. 

Do you want to elope because you want your day to be just about you and your partner? Do you want to avoid the stress of planning a larger wedding? Or do you want to plan an elopement because you want to authentically celebrate your love in a meaningful way, free from anyone else’s expectations and conformity? 

Answering this question with your partner will make you both feel more confident in your decision to elope without making any compromises or fulfilling someone else’s idea of what your wedding should look like. 

What’s the why behind your elopement? 

This is similar to the question above, but it’s good to think about why you want to elope. I can almost 100% guarantee that anyone you share this news with will ask, “Why are you eloping?” 

Whether your answer is that you want something less stressful than a wedding, you want to create an experience with just your partner that you’re going to remember forever, you want to elope because it’s unique and personal, etc., having an answer to this question is important for you and your partner to affirm your decision.

Plus, being secure in this answer will make the entire process of telling your friends and family less stressful. Instead of feeling like you are constantly having to justify your decision or come up with reasons, you’ll be able to clearly say, “This is why we made this decision.” 

How do you picture your wedding day? 

If your vision of your wedding day includes having all your family, extended family, and friends at your wedding – an elopement might not be the best fit for you and your partner. Elopements are meant to be smaller gatherings or just a celebration with only you and your partner.

Ask yourself – how much do you value having everyone around you to celebrate? Are you okay with forgoing a more formal, traditional wedding? Make sure that you sit down and talk with your partner about how you both envision your wedding day and that your visions match so that you’re both happy (and excited) about your decision. 

You can also think about whether what you value is celebrating with your friends and family or actually having them be there for your ceremony. If you just want to celebrate with them but still want that intimate moment with your partner, you can plan to elope in private and still have a bigger reception with your loved ones. 

Do you want your family or friends to be a part of your elopement? 

Some couples choose not to invite any family but want to ensure that their families are involved in other ways, while other couples choose to invite a handful of family members to their ceremony. 

If you and your partner want your ceremony to be just for the two of you, know that this is entirely valid. Many couples choose to have intimate, private ceremonies. I wrote an entire blog post to help you answer the question of whether you should include your family, which you can read here! 

5 Things LGBTQ Couples Should Consider Before Eloping

Before you say “I do” to an elopement, here are some important things you and your partner should consider. 

Location 

The cool thing about an elopement is that you can elope almost anywhere! Your location should be meaningful to you and your partner, but make sure that you learn more about the culture, your venue and vendor selection, and, most importantly, your and your partner’s safety and comfort.

I encourage you to choose a location that values inclusivity and is welcoming because this will make you and your partner feel more comfortable. It will also reflect your love for each other and celebrate your identity. 

Budget 

Another important thing to consider when you’re planning your elopement is your budget. Traditionally, elopements tend to be less expensive than weddings. However, that isn’t always the case.

The great thing about elopements, though, is that you are able to use your budget in different ways. Instead of spending most of it on a venue or food, maybe you can have a destination elopement or spend it on activities that you and your partner can do together. 

Figuring out your budget is an essential part of the planning process, and it will also influence the vendors you hire and the location you choose. 

Vendors 

As a queer person, finding wedding vendors who are not only great at what they do but also are going to celebrate who you are and who you love is so important. Especially with such a small and intimate day, there’s no room for hate or anyone who is going to do anything but lift you up.  

You want to find vendors who cross everything off your list and make you feel very safe and seen. Discover my best tips about finding LGBTQ+ vendors here. 

Support and Affirmation 

Whether it’s your location, your vendors, or your guests, as you plan your elopement, think about who will be there to support you and celebrate your love. 

When it comes down to it, you want to make sure that everyone who has a part in your elopement will celebrate the love that you and your partner have, affirm your identities, and offer their unwavering support.  

How Long Do You Want Your Elopement Day to Be

The last thing to consider is how long you want your elopement day to be. Your elopement can be as long or short as you and your partner want, but based on your answer, this will influence other events you plan during your day. 

Think about what you want to include – a first look, reading a letter from your partner or family, a candlelit dinner, etc.- and how everything will fit within your elopement timeline. 

Or if you want something short and sweet, that’s totally possible too! Remember, your elopement gets to look however you and your partner want. 

Final Thoughts on LGBTQ+ Elopement Tips 

I hope that you found this guide helpful, that it helped you gain clarity on whether you and your partner want to elope, and that you found these tips and questions helpful. 

Your elopement is unique to you. If a traditional wedding doesn’t feel right for you or your partner, there are other options available—options that let you let your imagination run wild and allow you and your partner to express yourselves however you want. 

If you are still looking for a queer elopement photographer, I’d love to chat! You can look at my elopement photography services here or head over here to get in touch and start chatting about your dream wedding day!