Tips for Finding Queer Affirming or LGBT Wedding Vendors

As a queer person, finding wedding vendors who are not only great at what they do, but also are going to celebrate who you are and who you love is so important. But, you may also be wondering where to start or how to actually find LGBT wedding vendors.

Being a queer elopement photographer myself, I completely understand how important of a decision this is for you and honestly, there is no room for hate or negative vibes when it comes to your wedding planning.

So, if you are looking for those queer-affirming or LGBT wedding vendors, here are some of my top tips and things to look for to help you find the right fit!

Tips for Finding LGBT Wedding Vendors

As you start your search for your wedding vendors, here are a few things that you can keep in mind and look for. Now, one important note here is that your vendors shouldn’t just tick one of these boxes. You want to find vendors who cross everything off the list and make you feel very safe and seen.

Pay attention to the language they use on their website and social media

Newlyweds bowling together at a bowling alley

A queer newlywed couple kissing on a city sidewalk

Newlyweds holding hands and smiling together

One of the first things you can look at when you are looking for inclusive vendors is the language that they use on their website and across their social media.

Are they constantly using terms like “bride” and “groom”? When you go to fill out the contact form, do you have to put the names of the bride and groom on it? Or, are you finding that they are using more gender-neutral terms like partners and couples instead?

Something as small as this can help to signal if the vendor is a queer-affirming vendor and is actively working to make sure that everyone feels seen and heard. When it comes to wedding venues, even something like their getting ready spaces being named something other than “bridal suite” can give you insight into what that venue values.

You also want to look and see if there are any statements or values made throughout the site. Are they specifically saying that they are queer-friendly or that they believe that all love should be celebrated?

Finally, are they actively using and asking for pronouns? Do you have the option to list your pronouns in the contact form? Do they share theirs throughout the site? Do they share their couple’s pronouns on their website or social media?

All of this inclusive language should be very clear and prominent throughout everything that the vendor puts out. This means you should get the same vibe and see the same language on their website as you do on their social media or on their newsletter or even in videos that they publish.

Look at who they highlight online

A queer couple during a hand-fasting ceremony at their wedding

Newlyweds standing close together holding out the end of their dresses

Who the vendor decides to highlight online and on their social media can also give you a look into whether or not they are truly inclusive. Are they only sharing straight, cis weddings time and time again? Are you seeing any diversity in the couples that book them?

When it comes to vendors, some may say that they are queer-friendly, but if they are not actually backing it up by highlighting those couples, it can be a bit of an issue. You don’t want someone being a part of your wedding who is just going through the motions. You want people around you who truly support you and actively want to showcase how incredible you and your partner are.

Check for reviews from other queer couples

A couple holding hands and leaning in opposite directions

A couple standing close together as one leans on a wall

A person sitting down while their partner rests their arm on their shoulder and smiles

There is no better way to get an inside look into what it is like to work with someone than to read past couple’s words on their experience. So, look for other queer couples that have worked with that vendor and see what they have to say.

Did they feel supported and seen throughout the entire process? Was there anything extra that the vendor did for them? Are you seeing the same types of reviews for non-queer couples that you are seeing for queer ones?

That is an important distinction to make because you want to make sure that your experience is going to be just as amazing as it would be with a straight couple. If you are seeing that those couples have significantly better reviews or it seems like they are going over the top for them but you’re not seeing the same things in the queer reviews, that is something to take note of.

Ask for recommendations from your vendors as you hire them

A couple kissing as one of them is putting on a pair of boots

Newlyweds kissing as they walk down a small path

A close up of white shoes with rainbow stitching on them

One of the best things about finding LGBT wedding vendors is that they are most likely going to be able to give you recommendations for other queer-affirming vendors they have worked with in the past.

This means you don’t have to sit there and second guess everything because you have someone giving you options for people who they have personally worked with and know are going to be the right fit for you.

As a queer person myself, I truly understand how important this is and how much weight a recommendation has. That is why I vet all of the vendors that I recommend to my couples so they are sure that anyone they reach out to based off of my input is someone who is going to be queer-affirming.

Potential Red Flags

When it comes to potential red flags, there are a few things that you can keep an eye out for that can help you along the way.

Only having a single “token gay couple” online

If your vendor is only showing off a single “token gay couple” and that is the only queer couple that you see on any of their social media or website, that can be a bit of a red flag. Especially if year after year you are still only seeing that single couple.

You don’t want to find vendors who are just putting a single couple out there to feel like they are checking a box off and that’s it. You want to find people who are constantly showing off queer couples and highlighting them the same way they are any other couple.

Only sharing about or highlighting queer couples during Pride Month

A close up of wedding rings on two hands

A couple holding hands as they say their vows

Don’t get me wrong, showcasing queer love during Pride Month is important, but that shouldn’t be the only time that they are doing it. Again, you don’t want vendors who are just putting on a display or doing something because it’s what you’re supposed to do during this month.

You want to find vendors who are highlighting and elevating queer love stories all year long. It should be something that they are actively excited about and want to show off, not something that they feel obligated to do.

The Importance of Finding Inclusive Wedding Vendors

A person standing behind their partner with their arms around them kissing their cheek

A couple standing forehead to forehead smiling

A couple sitting at a wooden table together drinking coffee

When it comes down to it, finding inclusive wedding vendors can really make a major difference in your wedding. After all, this is one of the most important days of your life and there’s no room in it for people who are going to support you and your love 100%.

So, it is really important that you don’t rush into anything and you take some time to do some research, talk to these vendors, and ask people for their recommendations. You can also think about if you want to find queer-owned/queer-operated vs queer-affirming vendors.

When you hire queer-owned/operated vendors, you not only know that they are going to be inclusive and supportive of your love, but they also have a deeper understanding of you and your relationship.

There are most likely going to be a lot of shared experiences between you and they are going to understand why it is so important for you to have people around you on your wedding day who want to celebrate you.

Now, that’s not to say that queer-affirming vendors are any less or that you shouldn’t hire them. They are still there for the same exact reasons and want to be a part of celebrating and capturing this incredible moment between you and your partner.

However, you may find that there can be some intricacies between you and your partner’s relationship (or your relationship with any of your family) that they don’t quite relate to as much as a queer person would.

Final Thoughts on Finding Queer-Affirming/Queer Wedding Vendors

Hopefully, these tips and red flags to look out for can help you as you work to find the perfect wedding vendors for your special day. When it comes down to it, you ultimately just want to make sure that everyone who has a part in your wedding day is truly there to make it special and celebrate the love that you and your partner have.

And, if you are still looking for LGBT wedding vendors and need a photographer, I’d love to chat! You can take a look at my elopement photography services here or you can head over here to get in touch and start chatting about your dream wedding day!